Manners Monday: Sex and Gender

Since we all love Mondays and we Grandma decided to teach us the difference between a Bouillon spoon and a Grapefruit spoon and how to properly sit with our legs crossed rather than what we really need to know (all things writing and publishing), Mondays are dedicated to all things we need to know. You may not want to learn them, you may not want to learn them, but that book on your head will be put to better use, I promise you.  I'll bring to you common mistakes I think writers should just know, from grammar to word choice to how to properly sit in your chair at a conference pitch session without scaring the agent across from you. Tips range from first-grade knowledge politeness to Master's Degree expertise in grammar.

Sex and Gender

Here's one that I love and, people who try their hand at writing paranormal when they are not overly familiar with the genre, tend to make a lot (I'm looking at the millions of people who tried their own Twilight type many years ago when it was cool).

A man is a man and a woman is a woman. Right?

Not when that man is a werewolf or that woman is a vampire.

What makes a paranormal world so rich is the unique language each author creates. I'm not talking about creating a 5,000 page lexicon and inventing Klingon (though that particular fame to claim would be rockin'). Go back to the basics, question what you know and were taught at an early age. Imagine a people who were raised so differently, the way they refer to themselves is radically different: she is not a girl or woman or even a lady, she is a female, a young, a sorceress, a pup, a muggle (a word which my spell check still does not recognize; I find that very sad), a unit of measurement, etc, etc. 

But calling someone a man or male doesn't extend just to the awesome genre of Paranormal or Fantasy or SciFi (or what have you). It applies to our feline and canine friends as well (the non-shape-shifting kind). In a normal world, contemporary fiction for example, you refer to a girl cat as a "female." You can call a human girl a female, but we have a more correct term for it: "woman."

So all I am saying is, if your human is of the non-magical persuasion, call a pear a pear: man and woman. If your person-shaped creature is of the fantastical persuasion, male and female are much more apt. Beyond that, call them as you want, apples, oranges, and otherwise.

If you completely disagree, that's okay! Make it part of your world. Have rules.

What is your favorite non-human term for a man or woman (and from where)?



Happy writing!

Monday Madness: Objects vs Humans

Since we all love Mondays and we all love Grammar and the minutes of writing, Mondays are hereafter dedicated to things we'd rather leave in the dark. Might as well start the week with a kick in the pants. I'll bring to you the mistakes I see all the time as an agent (or just a concerned English Major) and things I think writers should just know. Tips will range from first-grade knowledge of the English language, to Master's Degree.

Quick shout out to Gina who mentioned this in the comments last week. It was on my list of things to discuss, so I moved it up because it is a very important thing for writers to be aware of. :)

WHO vs THAT

Which of the following sentences are correct?

1. Roger is a serial killer that kills only bad people.
2. Rapists, murderers, and drugs dealers are all people who deserve to die.
3. The justice system is an outdated system who doesn't always work.
4. Sometimes we need to resort to new measures that keep our streets safe.

 Two and four are both correct; one and three are incorrect.

When referring to a person, you have to use "who". The subject of sentence 1 is "Roger", and Roger is a person--not a "that", so the correct sentence would read, "Roger is a serial killer who kills only bad people". Likewise, in sentence 2, "rapists, murderers, and drug dealers" are people, so they also get the human treatment of "who".

Don't agree? Consider the following (I'm borrowing from Gina because it is a very good example): "I like girls who aren't obsessed with themselves." Would you argue that "girls" is actually an object? Well, I sure hope not!

Let's beat a dead horse, shall we? As long as it's one that doesn't stink up the place!

When referring to an object, use "that." In sentence 3, the subject is "justice system," which of course is an object. The correct sentence would read, "The justice system is an outdated system that doesn't always work." And in sentence 4, the subject is question is "measures," also an object.

You might notice I avoided using "pronouns" and "possessive" and all that technical jargon. Bleh. My job isn't to scare you off. In this instance, it's very easy to remember: human or non-human.

It might get fishy if we start talking about zombies though... Human? Non-human?

I cut off the head of the zombie that tried to eat my flesh.
or
I shot a hole in the head of the zombie who was chomping on my best friend.

I think in this case, it depends whether you or your protagonist is sympathetic towards zombies. Likewise, I'd probably refer to my dog as a "who" but refer to a random wildebeest as a "that."

It's all about context. And knowing the rules before you can break them. As Grammar Girl says here, you might talk about your evil step mother, "the woman that married my father" if you really don't like her, whereas you'd talk about your "sweet mother who divorced my father."

Agents won't immediately write you off for mistakes of this caliber, but if we see them constantly, in every paragraph, we start suspecting a lazy writer that didn't bother to learn their grammar manners (see what I did there?!).

Happy writing!