January Query Time: What to include

Now we get to the particulars.

I find the list of "what to include in your query" to be much shorter than the "do not" list. Here's what you need: salutation with agent's name, about two paragraphs (3-6 sentences each) of summary/back cover blurb, briefly about the author, sign out.

Your query should look something like this:

Dear (name of agent),

about the ms

little more about the ms--word count and genre included

about the author

Thank you for your time. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

(name)
(email)
(website if applicable)
OR your usual closing signature

Nice and clean, right? This is my favorite sort of query. It launches right into the book with the main character, a tiny bit of world building if it's fantasy, sci-fi, dystopian, etc, the main struggle, love interest. Done. The author bio is in first or third person (no preference) and includes relevant information.

You can also do another format:

Dear (name),

(title) is a (word count) (genre). I'm submitting to you because you mentioned on your blog you want to see more (genre) queries/you like (specific book)/you represent (specific author)/my friend is your client-mother-brother-co-worker. One line hook.

about the ms

little about the author

Thank you for your time. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

(name)
(email)
(website if applicable)
OR your usual closing signature

Note the use of the word SPECIFIC several times throughout the opening paragraph. I can always tell when someone hasn't actually done their research. If you like my blog or I've mentioned liking one of your comparable titles or we've met somewhere, be specific. Anyone can say "I like your blog, here's my query." (Yes, it's happened.)

Your "about the ms" should be simple and to the point. By simple, I mean use simple sentences. Don't get fancy. Agents read a lot of queries daily, and I for one tend to skim-read--if I find something of interest, I slow down. But if your sentences are too long, packed with info, convoluted, I can't retain as much info as quickly (and there's a good bet your ms will look like that too). By "to the point," I mean get in and get out. Here's an example:

(name of main character) is (brief description). She's thrust into (main conflict). She must rely on (love interest) which is an issue because (personal dilemma). (evil character) will stop at nothing to (what's at stake).

Your query is obviously going to be more involved. But there are the main points you need to hit.

• Why should we care about you main character? Who is she/he? How will we connect with him/her?
• What's her life like before the problem?
• What and how does the main conflict get thrust upon her?
• Who is the love interest? Or other character of large importance--keep this absolutely limited to one or two people (three on occasion). You don't want to bombard the agent with info and characters; also, it takes to long to portray their significance and "why we should care."
• Who is the bad guy? This can be grouped up there with the main conflict. Remember your "man vs man" "man vs self" "man vs nature" from third grade.
• What's at stake? Vitally important. Is the world going to implode? Is the main character going to lose her family? Her sanity? Her self respect? The chance to avenge her father?

Read back cover blurbs of books. Seriously. Sit in a bookstore aisle and pull books off the shelves. Note how they draw you in, first to the character, then to the conflict. And notice how brief it is. For the books that you read, note how many subplots and characters get left out. It's necessary. Which is also a good reason to have critique partners help you, and you help them. It gives you perspective.

Ask all the questions you want to ask. Next week, I'll answer them.

Happy writing!

January Query Time: What not to include

I'll try to keep on topic and off of rants and fun stories about horrible queries I've seen. Like this one time...

We've discussed why a query is important, what it is, what it's not. Here's a handy list of what not to include. Thursday will be what to include, how to format, etc.

• Apologies. Nothing turns me off more than a writer apologizing for taking up my time. Or telling me how swamped I am. Or being humble, or anything like that. In this regard, keep it impersonal. Formal.
• Aggression. Don't blame me for you being rejected. Don't blame readers or publishers or the state of the economy. Besides distracting me from the important stuff--the query--it makes me not want to work with you.
• Excuses. If you make an excuse for why your word count is too long, just don't query. If you find yourself needing to explain the first few pages or why you need to get past the first fifty to really get into the story, you shouldn't be querying. You know deep, deep, deep down that there's something wrong. We want a close-to-finished-you-slaved-over-it-went-to-classes-and-had-beta-readers-read-it query/ms.
• Don't tell me it's been professionally edited or that your friend who's an English major has edited it. And especially don't tell me that you'll have it edited if I think that's best. (you should be getting the gist--get to the query)
• You don't need a hook. My preference is getting straight to the query. And don't introduce it with, "Thanks for your time. Here's my query..." or "Now, on to the query!" 
• If you use a hook, please, please, please, keep it to one line. Two at most. If the sentence is overly wrought or too long, I get bored. It's TELLING not SHOWING. Your query SHOWS, you TELL.
• To introduce your author bio just say, "I've been published by (specific publisher, name of book, year of publication)" or "I'm a member of (specific organizations)." Etc. Don't say, "Now, a little about me." Again, it's distracting (you won't get automatically rejected if you break this rule--my rule--but do keep it in mind).
• Don't say you've been writing for years, since you were a little kid, just quit your job to write full time, your mother loves your stories, etc. It looks amateurish. If you have nothing in your bio, thank the agent for his/her time and close.
• Don't offer an exclusive. Don't say who it's currently out with.
• I don't care if you tell me it's a simultaneous submission. I assume it is--it's a smart practice. I hate finally getting to a query after a month only to find out I was the only one it was submitted to. I made you wait a month before you could get to anyone else! Remember my job-application metaphor? Would you put in an application for only one job at a time and wait until they got back to you?

Get to the query. Have you ever called someone up or visited someone and you just need one bit of information from them? You make a little polite chitchat and suddenly you can't get away from the person. And before you know it, you know all their woes and the name of their first dog--fluffy-kins. It was a rottweiler. Agents are looking for that one bit of information--not the extras. That can come later with the phone call.

Last week, I said that the query is not a business letter. Particularly, I was thinking about the header you include on business letters--your address, my address, etc. Maybe in the days of old, when people still used snail mail, that was common practice for queries. But you don't need it (also, it's a telltale if you didn't do your research; for example, our agency has moved its main offices from CA to WA, so if you use the old address, I know you're not doing your research). It's distracting. You won't get rejected over it, but most of my advice this month tends to be towards the "cleaner and tighter, the better". (I'm going to talk more about this business letter thing next week--it deserves the attention.)

More on Thursday.

Happy writing!

January Query Time: What it's not

Now we now why a query is important and what it is. But what isn't it?

It's not:

• A synopsis
• An apology
• Begging
• A mass letter
• One line asking the agent to look at the attached materials
• Two lines asking if the agent is accepting queries
• Three lines asking what sort of genres the agent accepts
• Unaddressed
• A business letter
• A letter to a friend
• A solicitation
• A complaint
• An opportunity to sell me your self-pubbed book
• An opportunity to brag
• An opportunity to blame
• An opportunity to whine

Wow, that was actually a lot of fun.

Next week, I'll go over what to include in a query and what not to include. If I don't cover something vitally important or you'd like a clarification, please leave a comment.

Happy writing!

January Query Time: What it is

I'll spend more time on this next week, getting down into the particulars. But for an overview...

A QUERY IS a brief overview of your manuscript, a back cover blurb, designed to intrigue an agent or editor to read more, and can incorporate important highlights of your author bio.

Imagine you're looking for a job.

Haunting, I know.

You put together your resume, cover letter, and list of job opportunities. Sounding familiar? Your query is, in essence, an application.

Now, imagine you're in HR looking to hire a new employee. You have one job available and 500 applicants (we're in a recession, aren't we?). 450 go into the immediate NO pile because they're not qualified, the job is wrong for them, or something about their first few lines just turns you off. The remaining 50 dwindle after a closer look, probably for many of the same reasons above, they just weren't that obvious on the surface. Say you call 10 people back. Three never respond, one can't make the interview. 6 are left. You interview them. Maybe a second interview. Maybe you have another colleague interview them as well.

If you're lucky, one of those candidates are exactly what you're looking for. So you hire them.

How long does the average employer spend on each application if they have a stack just staring at them? Not long.

On Thursday, What a Query Isn't.

Happy writing!

January Query Time--Importance of the Query Letter

It's a new year. Let's start with the basics.

Okay, not the basics. The basics are sentence construction. I might be inclined to rant about the misuse of semi-colons every now and then, but otherwise I leave that to your first grade teacher.

We all know how important a query is. Most of us know what it is. Some of us know what it is not.

This month will be broken down into sections. Next week: what it is and what it is not.

Today: the importance

• It gets your foot in the door. Agent reads. Agent likes. Agent requests pages. Another post for another day.
• Demonstrates your knowledge and use of proper sentence and paragraph construction.
• Demonstrates your ability to structure ideas in a concise form.
• Demonstrates your ability to follow direction.
• Shows that the ms has unique characters and complete plot.
• Proves you know how to sum up your book and describe it in the most market-friendly way.
• Unless you're just really naturally good at it, a good query will show the agent that you've spent time and effort on the process. You're someone we want to work with.

And all that without you having to TELL us any of that. Amazing what a little SHOW can do, right?

Happy writing!